Was god drunk when he faked evolution?

On the evening of the fifth day, god, after creating the fish and the birds, gets a little drunk. He was almost done with his project, he has a big day tomorrow, creating the mammals and then the icing on the cake, the people. He would get a day off, but he knew, of course he knew, those guys would pester him forever, always asking for things, nagging, nagging, nagging. He had fun making all this, but how could he get out of the customer service?

And then it hit him. He thought it through, went back to his workbench and fiddled. His prank might not work, but it was worth a try. He moved around the plants, fish and birds. He took some of the spare parts for his animals and buried them around the world. The next morning, god got up, a little hung over and chuckling to himself, spread out the mammals and placed the different groups of people just right.

It wouldn’t be easy, he just had to hide, shut up and pretend that he wasn’t responsible, that he didn’t even exist. He had to get them to believe that it all just happened. That things just evolved on their own.

He really needed that day off.


Evidence of evolution is widespread, coherent and is evidence of life starting billions of years ago.

To believe that god created earth a few thousand years ago with flora and fauna immutably in their current form is to believe that god created an extremely elaborate hoax.

He crafted fossils and painstakingly placed them throughout the world to be perfectly coherent with the fact that plants and animals had slowly evolved over millions of years. He also separated existing flora and fauna and placed them in groups around the globe in a complex pattern that points to them evolving through time and space in a logical order, perfectly matching evolutionary theory.

What is the point? To test our faith in front of contradictory evidence? Why give us a brain if we shouldn’t use it?

6000-years-ago

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